Self-esteem is the opinion you have of yourself and there are two components
- Competence: confidence in one's ability to think,
learn, choose, and make appropriate decisions, to master challenges
- Worth: confidence in one's right to be happy, and
that achievement, success, friendship, respect, love and fulfillment
are appropriate for oneself.
Practice self-acceptance: it is the refusal to think
of any part of ourselves - our bodies, our fears, our thoughts, our actions,
our dreams - as alien, as "not me."
Where does self-esteem come from?
- YOU buying into someone else's opinion of you.
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."
- When I know better, I do better. It's okay to make mistakes.
- I will always listen to my heart and trust my truth above all other
- I love and respect myself...just the way I am.
- Practice humility: the quality of being modest and respectful. Do
not confuse humility and humiliation; which is the loss of dignity or
pride. Being humble does not equal weakness. The truly humble person
is the strongest of all. A humble person has an inner light and quiet
confidence that draws others to them, like a moth to a flame.
- Practice the attitude of gratitude - having a bad hair day? Imagine
a no hair day. Try every day to be grateful for something you've never
been thankful for before.
- Avoid the comparison trap. Stop comparing your insides to someone
else's outsides. If someone has something that you wish you had, instead
of being jealous, add it to your wish list and say "That's for me!"
- Hang around with people who make you feel good.
Remember the 3 C's:
Your mind believes everything you tell it and will go to work to make
that your reality. So it's important to begin to notice how you talk to
3 C's can help you eliminate that negative habit:
- Catch the negative self-talk.
- Cancel it. By saying "cancel" you deprogram your
mind and stop the action.
- Change it. Replace the negative statement with
a more positive one.
- Practice positive self-talk: Every day in every way I'm getting
better and better.
- Challenge that critical inner voice that says things like "I'm such
a loser." "Nobody likes me." Instead replace those thoughts with more
objective and powerful thoughts like "I know I'm going to succeed."
"I'm a good person."
- Conceit vs. Confidence: Walking that fine line. Let's face
it, we've all met someone who thinks they are all that. Someone who
is so full of themselves and totally consumed with "I, Me, My." Conceit
is having too much (false) pride in yourself. Confidence is a belief
in yourself and your ability to succeed. It's not about thinking less
of yourself, but rather thinking about yourself less. As you shift your
focus on what you can do for others, your confidence grows.
- Know your own value: If you were offered a $20 bill, you'd
want it right? If it was crumpled up and stepped on, you'd still want
it right? Sometimes life crumples us up and steps on us. But it is NOT
what happens, but how you respond to what happens that determines the
quality of your life.
- When you care more about how you feel than what anyone else thinks...then
you are well on your way to HIGH Self-Esteem and Empowerment!